Tuesday, November 17, 2009

No Mo NaNoWriMo


OK, a man's gotta know when he's beaten. I officially retire from this year's NaNoWriMo. Sigh. Those toothache days put me so far behind and I just kept getting left further back. My friend Dee is doing it and she posted on Facebook last night that she's nearing 30,000 words...more than three times more than me. I persisted until yesterday but the writing was on the wall...or rather it wasn't I guess. But you just wait 'til next year!

After a little polish I think I can get a really good short story out of my efforts, though! Take out a lot of the exposition and restructure a couple of scenes and I honestly think it might work better as a short story, in fact!

Here's an excerpt from the first draft:

"Dr. Erlich?"


The man in the spherical cushioned chair awkwardly sat staring at the now blank wall. He was 46 years old and his name was Hans Erlich. That much he knew. Absolutely nothing else was a certainty anymore.


"Dr. Erlich, as I say, that...that old television vid...that very one...was why we had been expecting you. It's so helpful on rare occasions such as this when such accurate records have survived and ultimately been preserved in the World Archive. Forgive me. Would you like a glass of water, Dr. Erlich? I promise you, sir, it will be okay. I've seen this many, many times before."

He was trying to be helpful. Erlich could somehow sense that. It's just that the words he was saying weren't sinking in for some reason. Who was this man anyway? Somebody had told him but he couldn't recall. He had neatly trimmed hair and wore a shiny blue suit the likes of which he'd never seen before. With an oddly shaped badge. Reminded him of a fractal. Clean-shaven and friendly looking, though. "I'm sorry but...could you tell me again?" asked Dr. Erlich.

"Of course, " laughed the other man as he paced back and forth with his hands clasped behind his back. "I understand. I really do. Okay! My name...is Peter 46587. I have been assigned as your TDO, your Temporal Displacement Officer. It is and will be my duty to help you to assimilate into our society in any and every way possible." He stopped directly in front of the sleek chair where Dr. Erlich sat so uncomfortably and leaned in closely with a big toothy grin. "You did it, Hans! You made it. It's the year 2210."


Dr. Erlich shifted, straightening out of the near fetal position in which he had inadvertently planted himself. "Then...this is all for real? It's true? I succeeded? I'm the first man to actually travel forward in time?"


The other man turned away. "Well..., on that score...I'm afraid I may have to disappoint you."

3 comments:

  1. You got a great start, Steve. I look forward to seeing the rest of this somewhere.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Yeah, sounds like a great start! We durn well better get a chance to read this somewhere down the line!

    Are you sure you're done for this year's NaNoWriMo? I mean they've got the blog and the kickstarts and so on to help keep the writers writing...there's still almost 2 weeks left...you're SURE you're done?

    Tho a good toothache can really kick a guy's ass...but I expect that Hunter *S Thompson* would have gulped down a bunch of good drugs to kick the toothache's ass...ducked low to avoid the bats, and kept on writing...what? No good contacts these days to get the good drugs? Aw, man...

    Hey, you at least signed up and started and kept writing some, which is about a million times more than I did (next year, tho, look out!).

    It's still more likely to become a full-fledged story now than it was before NaNoWriMo, right?

    Write on, man.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I must know what happens next!

    ReplyDelete